Courtney Weber : Foreign Friendships

Courtney looking over the City of Stirling

On a rainy night in Scotland I found myself sitting next to Ryan at the pub asking him why the two of us out of everyone on the frisbee team became friends.  Ryan said, “there will always be people who gravitate towards each other in this world and it is inevitable for them to become friends”.  That moment replays in my mind every time I think of Scotland and all the friends I had to leave behind. 

When I first arrived in Scotland, I was lonely.  I am a typical extrovert, and I was looking for some social interaction.  I made friends through try outs for several sports teams.  I started with volleyball, but they seemed very cliquey.  A few days after later, one of my flat mates invited me to the ultimate frisbee tryout.  When I arrived, I was welcomed by players who cared to remember my name and teach me their sport.  The people of the frisbee team known as Blaze had no obligation to open up to me and invest in me as a player because they knew I would be gone in a few months.  Their eagerness to invest in me showed that they would be my friend when it was not convenient to them.  I was just some American wanting to play frisbee with them, but they made a choice to include me and treat me as one of their own. 

Ryan and I met at a frisbee practice when he noticed me failing to complete the hammer throw technique.  He graciously came over to help after laughing at me for about 10 minutes.  Ryan and I shared the same humor and seemed to connect quickly.  I became best friends with an English Frisbee playing dog walker.  This friendship was a connection with someone who came from a completely different background than my own.  Ryan shared stories about losing two of his best friends before the age of 23, what it is like to grow up in England, and how to make the most of my university experience.  His wise words at 2:00 in the morning after only a “couple” of scotches still run through my head. 

Ryan had no reason to choose to be my friend.  He knew that I was going to be leaving in a few months to continue life in the states, but instead he took me in and showed me what it is like to be a true Scot (though he was a true English man himself).  He took me on adventures of the town and introduced me to all of his friends.  I was invited to game night, where I learned how to play dungeons and dragons.  As weeks would go on, we would make plans to drive to wonderful places and go on wild adventures across the United Kingdom. 

Members of Blaze Ultimate Frisbee Team

When I was sent the email that I should return home immediately, everyone I had built a relationship with was given a second chance to not invest more time in me because I would be leaving.  To my surprise quite the opposite occurred.  Following my last practice with Blaze I was sent off in true Blaze fashion.  They all lined up to give me hugs, wish me safe travels, and to say their goodbyes.  I held my tears back during these goodbyes just enough to make it off the pitch and back to my flat where my packed bags were waiting for me.  The night before I left Scotland, I had a party at the local Wetherspoons restaurant.  Every person I considered a close friend from Scotland came to send me off back to America.  I was puzzled as to why these people chose me to be their friend.  Most of these people could have made connections with other University students that were going to be around for the next 3 years, but they chose me.  Many of these friendships taught me about other cultures, people, and myself.  This was the first time I saw myself as a friend people found worth investing in.  Leaving these friendships and people made them real.  No one needed to stay in touch with me after I left, but they all have, and we enjoy seeing each other grow. 

The final goodbye to Ryan was the one I dreaded the most, as I packed my bags and prepared for my trip home.  Ryan drove me to the airport and helped me carry my bags all the way to airport security before we even looked at each other.  We both knew what this plane ride meant.  This plane ride could be the last time we ever get to see each other.  Once I stood outside the security gates, we looked at each other and said our final goodbyes that came way too soon.  He told me all the adventures he will take me on when I come back and we both parted our ways.  The first few hours still did not feel like I was going home, I still felt like I was going to be sitting in the pub right next to him the next day, but deep down I just wanted that to be true.  This experience gave me lifelong friends and greater understanding about people that I will carry with me throughout my entire life.  

Ryan and Courtney 

Courtney completed her breakaway experience at the University of Stirling in Scotland during spring of her sophomore year (2020).  Courtney plans to graduate from Lander in spring of 2022 with a degree in Exercise Science.  After completing this degree, she plans to attend graduate school to complete her Physician Assistant degree.